Unpleasant little man.....

This morning started out as any other, beautiful sunshine, blue skies and dogs eager to go down to the river.  I hung the washing on the line to blow gently in the warm breeze, got dressed, pulled on my trainers, grabbed the dog leads and watched the sun hide behind the dark clouds...got a jumper...and headed out.

The wind had turned a decidedly cooler and stronger kind of gust but still was a pleasant morning to be going to the river and having our daily walk.  I get to scratch a couple of young calves on their noses whilst their mothers looked on approvingly or just thankful that someone else is paying attention to their young and demanding teenage offspring, whilst my two dogs jump and splash in the river.  Nearing the entrance to the river, through the kissing gate, the dogs were getting excited, Iz was trying to get the ball from me before we could get to the field and Defi was beginning to annoy with his constant weeing on every single blade of grass he could drag me too, when I saw a friend.  This friend is an older gentleman, a man of standing, a retired Captain with a lovely dog Dennis.  Usually the wife is with them but this morning the two boys were on their own and just leaving having had their walk. As they drive to the river, not being as close as me, they were already in their car.  As good manners dictate, Captain, as he shall be called, stopped to say good morning.  Defi was beside himself, we were stopping to chat, didn't I know there were blades of grass that needed his urine?  Iz couldn't contain her energy and my not quite 8 year old Golden Retriever started jumping up at me like a naughty puppy of 32kgs.  We chatted for a moment or two through the open car window, Captain having pulled up next to me on the lane. 

Our lanes are narrow, one car wide or two very small cars with young drivers or those that are just obnoxious and rude.  We get tractors, cows and sheep being moved from field to farm, cars, joggers, walkers, all manner of traffic on our quiet lanes few and far between but mostly considerate.  Today is bin day.  The local refuse collection lorry comes down our quiet lanes on Wednesdays so everyone's bins are out and ready, when the peace was shattered by a cyclist careering round the corner in the middle of the lane at top speed yelling 'there's a car' to his partner, who turned out to be a woman going equally as fast.  I would guess that they were married, or at least a close couple due to the fact both wore matching black lycra clad bodies, identical cycles the kind with paper thin tyres and lightweight frames and those ridiculous looking helmets, which do protect the head but which those speeding cyclists seem to think that they need a long pointy bit on the back, which, in my opinion, just serves to give passing folk a good giggle as they look completely like idiots.  This lycra clad, testosterone fuelled man then started to swear loudly using plenty of obscene words, both Captain and I couldn't contain ourselves and both blurted out 'slow down then' to his torrent of abuse, it was at this point that the second lycra clad blurr whizzed past.  Mr Lycra, whose clothing left nothing to the imagination and I can only assume that he cycled so fast to make himself feel like a real man as his skin hugging attire was lacking in any lumps and bumps, then threw himself off his bicycle in a fit of toddler screaming tantrum and started to behave in a manner most aggressive and unbecoming.  Thank goodness my dogs were behaving and with me as I do believe that he would have approached both myself and Captain such was his fury.

After a few minutes of him making hand gestures from his forehead and using words that a good woman...maybe not me...would blush at, he got back on his bike and flew away.  I can only hope that around the next bend was the bin men in their rather fetching bright green truck.